direct from . . .
Top Ten Signs You're at a Cheaply Run Haunted House
(submitted by The Frunkus Kid)
They've already put up the Christmas decorations.
(Micklin T. Rahe, Never Full Of The Spirit Until The 22nd)
The spooks are all playing violins and have their hats on the floor for donations.
The strobe light is achieved by a kid waving a piece of cardboard in front of desk lamp.
The guy taking money at the the door says BOO and shoves you through a door that leads to an alley full of angry people who want their money back.
When it's time for the wherewolf noise, the guy kicks a beagle
Casper's on a picket line outside, demanind a "living" wage.
Instead of a chain saw, there's just some kid running around with an electric toothbrush.
Instead of admission, you're asked to put change in the meter to keep the 1962 "Haunted Mobile Home" from being towed.
It looks like a real house with no lights on. The guy at the door tells you to be quiet on your way through and bring out as many home electronics as you can carry.
Before entering the Dungeon of Doom, you have to sit through a 20-minute speal on Miami Timeshares.
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Last modified: Oct 24, 2013