direct from . . .
Top Ten Reasons Not to Go Swimming after Eating
(submitted by beast)
Your mom might just be right, and wouldn't you feel stupid then?
(I told you so)
When that mustard stain washes off in the water, it makes it look like you just peed.
People will mistake you for the world's largest prune.
Your Speedo will cover even less of your unsightly flab.
Bears smell fear, pigs smell truffles, sharks smell french fries.
Gas propulsion is forbidden in the pool.
You ate lunch with the Gorilla of a Lifeguard's girlfriend. A long run might be a better activity.
Do you really want kids to fight over using you as a flotation device?
Stomach noises interfere with Navy SONAR equipment.
It is very hard to find someone to give you mouth-to-mouth after eating 3 onion sandwiches.
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Last modified: Sep 17, 2007