direct from . . .
Top Ten Signs That Your Neighbor Is a Superhero
(submitted by Toe9)
He always brings up the threat of world domination at the neighbourhood watch meetings.
You keep finding entire washing machines full of spandex in the basement laundry room.
Your grill: Half a bottle of lighter fluid and a box of matches later it's still cold. His grill: Bursts into flames worthy of a rocket launch when he looks at it.
(Asteria "the wannabe superhero")
There are always stacks of twisted iron beams at his curbside on trash day.
When it rains, you can almost make out his invisible jet.
He wins at poker so often, it's like he can see through the damn cards!
Whenever you invite him over for barbecues, he amuses the children by lifting up your house.
Just uses adamantium claw to open wine instead of clumsy corkscrew.
He's always tinkering with that bloody rocket car in the driveway.
He BETTER be, or those auditions for healthy, flexible young orphan "sidekicks" are pretty suspicious.
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Last modified: Nov 6, 2003