direct from . . .
Top Ten Signs You Are On A Bad Cruise
(submitted by C. Sick)
Your entire cruise is spent in Nebraska.
The "twenty-four hour health club" advertised is the rowing section, and you got the 2am to 4am shift
The captain frequently comes below decks to ask if anyone wants to share a kegger with him and the crew.
(Jabba the Fatt)
All night buffet: big bag of Fritos and case of Diet Rite.
Shore excursions include scuba diving in New York's glorious East River.
"Welcome to the dinner show. I'm Chris, your featured ventriloquist. Unfortunately, my dummy is a mute, but he is learning sign language, so if you'll bear with me here..."
The all-you-can-eat buffet consists entirely of 400 pounds of plankton.
That unexpected supply stop in Columbia for 2 tonnes of "icing sugar"
(M Loves D)
Dinner the first night: Dolphin Baby Suprise
The medical officer assures you the boat is "87% SARS-free".
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Last modified: Apr 17, 2003