direct from . . .
Top Ten Signs you've read too many Stephen King books.
(submitted by Dink in St. Joe, MO)
Who told you I read Stephen King? Are you reading my mind? Are you looking through my window?! WHAT'S THAT NOISE?!?!
You have the aorta of a small boy... in a jar on your desk.
You know..you JUST KNOW..the creature/car/alien/dog ain't dead yet!
Topiaries make you break out in cold sweats.
You think any household appliance is possibly possessed and/or a gateway to Hell.
You eye your lawnmower, local antique store and the crow on your lawn with immense paranoia.
At a book signing you ask Stephen King who ran him over: his dark half or his number one fan?
When the pilot announces you're flying over someplace like Derry, NH and you think "Wow, they really rebuilt quickly."
Your homeowner's insurance contains a "lamprey-men and evil clown coverage" clause.
You begin to think Maine is an exciting place.
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Last modified: May 1, 2001