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Top Ten Signs You're Addicted to Cheese
(submitted by Slywhitehampster)
You like your pizza without crust or sauce.
Your favorite cologne is "Eau de Limburger."
Finding a girl called Minnie becomes your top priority for dating.
Whenever facing a life crisis, you question yourself, "What would Chester Cheeto do at a time like this?"
Shamu has lower body fat than you do.
You find yourself doing grated Parmesan lines before bed.
After a rough night, you wake up in the dairy section of the food store, begging for just a slice.
(Boscoe the cat and Cavaco the great and powerful)
You use Kraft singles like the patch.
(Jim Scary, Bloodbond)
Your wife has threatened to leave you if you yell "behold the power of cheese!" just one more time while making love to her.
Your strident claims of "I can stop any time I want to!" keep coming out as "Squeek squeek squeek SQUEEK!!"
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Last modified: Sep 28, 2000