direct from . . .
Top Ten ways to Confuse Your College Professor
(submitted by Christy Michelle)
Write "There are footprints on the ceiling" on the blackboard.
Ask him for 10 ways to use calculus in everyday life.
(Behold! The Power of Cheese!)
Make an appointment for extra help. When you get to his/her office,lie down on the couch/floor and begin to tell him/her that it all started when you were five...
Bring him/her cookies and slippers, and sit crosslegged directly in front of him/her, fascinated throughout the lecture.
Put a fog machine on high and have everyone dress weird...when your prof. comes in, play soft music and pretend like it's all a dream.
Submit your beatnik poem as your final project in Computer Science, and your calculator program as your final poem in Creative Writing.
Play the Final Jeopardy theme song every time you ask your instructor a question.
Type your papers in 75 point font.
Cite page numbers beyond the end of the book. When challenged, assert that you're using the unabridged version.
Keep saying "That's not how Physics worked in THE MATRIX."
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Last modified: Jan 27, 2000